Lost and Found Race Report of Wicklow Way Race 2024

I don’t know what it says about IMRA but I have only partaken in two runs with them this year, registration for the first was in a casino and for the second it was in a bar!! As they say, run responsibly!!

What is it about an evening start to a race that just plays with your head?? What to eat? When to eat? When leave the house? Attempts to get last minute nano naps in, cause God knows your gonna regret not trying in a few hours’ time. Race day started as nearly all days do for me, wake up, milk cows, drink tea, do jobs, eat. This day was to be a little different, after all above was done and the boys were sorted Jen, and I packed the crew car with the usual array of crap you need to self-propel your way through 127km of running. We headed East on a nice clear Friday afternoon, drove through some showers of a biblical nature, had diner (How civilized!) and arrived at the bar for reg in good time. Jen tried to keep me off the phone as she drove over that day but failed to convince me sleep was more important than telling people who don’t really give a shit that we are on a road and it’s raining!!

Reg was a well-oiled machine, from an organisation point of view, I however was my usual mix of nerves and excitement which plunged straight into embarrassment when I had to be corrected by John-Joe that he was actually, John-Joe and the guy who looks absolutely nothing like him is Rowan. Open up and swallow me now I asked!! Quick mention of my dress sense, compliments of same! Over to bag check then and asked to show three random items. I don’t know who the young girl on bag check was, but she was very keen to see I had my compass with me, I keenly showed it and put it away again!! Little did we all know how big a part bearings and sense of direction was going to play in the night to come.

We left the warmth and temptation of the bar and walked back to the car and start line. A bit of shut eye, a few quick chats, a few nibbles, a crew plan, a few familiar faces, many nerves, much excitement, a race briefing and we were ready for off. Go the boss said but not before you all complete some sort of

“After you”

….

“No no, After you”

…..

Then you both go at once and get stuck at the hips together!!

Repeat this a few times

Add a few onlookers!

And finally, you put manners aside, squeeze out through the wall and just go ahead of them!!

“Thanks” you shout into the darkness and then your off for real!!

As always, the nerves dissipate with the first few meters, thoughts turn to the task at hand, the past cannot be changed. From here all you can do is write a story you’ll be proud of.

IMRA hid the Wicklow hills in darkness from me again but maybe that’s is when they are at their best I don’t know…..yet. The night was beautiful, the sky clear, the moon full, the air warm and city lights brought Dublin to life.

Footsteps feel into time with mine,

“I think I recognise you! Your Ed Payne, right?”

Oh, shit I thought, either I owe this lad money, or he wants to talk to me and cause my heart rate is probably running 40/60 beats faster than his, this conversation is gonna hurt either my wallet or my lungs!! Thankfully he wanted to talk and didn’t notice me easing the pace to hold the chats and it felt good to clip a few KM with him and just roll along. He ran outta patience and outta my view a while later and I was back inside my head.

I was rolling ok, passing an odd one, being passed by an odd one, CP1 came, Jen on it as always, all good. Course was great, we were doing our thing. However, in the back of head I knew my watch was not in the game, a few glances at the map screen and it had just felt odd. Somehow or through some silly upgrade I hadn’t noticed I now had a slightly annoying voice speaking to me and telling me about some of the turns, not them all but some. More chats, and more alone time, all good. 40km done.

Then a crossroads, no yellow man, go right sure, looks kind of right, glance at watch, trot on. 500 meters glance at watch ….. oh shit, turn around, run back uphill, yep up hill. Same crossroads, turn right again, now I’m going straight, right? Why didn’t I go straight first, Ed you are a dumbass. Trot on, glance, am I still off?? No, I’m right, my watch is definitely playing up, trot on. A Kilometre, maybe more maybe less…. Cul de sac!! But I’m right?? I’ve tried 2 of the 3 possible options, I know it wasn’t left, so was I bloody right when I went right first?? No way, Oh Ed you are a dumbass. Glance at watch.

(Right here was where I made my worst ever trail running decision, to date)

If I just go through this bit of forest, the trail is just the far side of it, I’ll be back on trail in a minute, great cause I was in an ok position, knocking around 10^th place I’d say. Let’s go!

Thick forest wrapped me up, I was going downhill, I had to crouch, an odd clearing for a massive rock or random steep dip but generally it was just thick downhill forest. Out I came, no trail, a hedge, a fence, on the far side of that just a big open field, homely but not the trail!! Phone rings, Jen,

“You’ve gone wrong!”

“You’re stating the obvious”, “Which way now?”

“Go back”

(Right here was where I made my worst ever trail running decision, to date)

“I thought the trail was out here, ok I’ll go back!”.

Uphill now, crouching, how far did I come? Straight up, I’ll be there soon, climb up, head down, I hate big Christmas trees, I must be there, it wasn’t this far! was it? that was downhill so this will feel harder, this is harder, I don’t need this, I was in a good position, where am I now? Go right, you’ve missed the clearing, I go right, still going up, must not be there yet, keep going, battery pulled out of headtorch, thrown into full darkness, find cable, reattach, keep going, Hair getting pulled, backpack catching in branches, fuse getting shorter …..

Phone rings, Jen,

“Your still not right”

“You still are not right” ……. Oh the irony of how many times I had already gone right but was yet very wrong, a real life Ultra running Zoolander!!

At this point I’m crouched on one knee my headtorch only fit to light a very small area of what at that point felt like a forest that reached all the way to Donegal! I flick my live location to Jen so she can track me, I needed to hang up so as my phone would use internet and track me, show Jen, and await a phone call back to tell me which direction to go next. Screen wet though, every action a test! We tick tacked a few calls.

Lilian calls, lets me know I’m lost, she is right too.

Reassure her that we’re sorting it.

Comforting call though!!

Jen calls, I’m going downhill again. I move faster than the four-way information triangle we have and just like that, like as if the world wants to show how tiny I am in the whole scheme of things I come out of the forest EXACTLY where I went back in from. Yes, I was back at the hedge, fence and open field, my two worst ever decisions while running had both ended me up at precisely the same point, an achievement in itself. Phone rings, Jen…….

“Where are you now?”

“I thought I was meant to be asking the questions?”….. “I’m where I was God knows how long ago, and I am not going back in that forest no matter what.”

“Go Right!”

The definition of insanity and all that but right I went, we stay on the phone,

“Look up”

“I see small tress!”

Newer tress, a weakness!!

“That must be it Jen confirms”

Short scramble upwards, forest track….. found again.

“What now?”

“Track back!!”

“At the crossroads?”

“Go Straight!!”

“Love you, Chat soon, Thanks!”

What just happened? How long have I been off trail? I was in an OK position, better than I was expecting!! I’m running now, I feel angry, how could I be so stupid. Straight back through the crossroads that I should never have even been at, no wonder there was no yellow man, anger/fury fills me!

Meet a runner, she corrects me, she knows things, she knows the turn. I shine my headtorch at the yellow man that I missed when I first passed, we are not friends!!

The hammer goes down, I’m moving now, fuelled by anger, dirty fuel that!!

I roll on again, road section, downhill, stretch them out, galloping now!! Someone says my name, quick glance!!

It’s Eoin, we fought battles together once, although on different fronts, but we won the war. Never met him, but I know him. He was full of good fuel, we had little in common just now, I was self-destructing!

“I got F**king lost”

“Man, you need to slow down!!”

Hammer down!! Run down, my breathing slows down, I'm calming down.….. a little. Pass two, Two pass me, catch two.

“Are you…..”

“I got F**king lost”

“We thought so!”

We’re pacing the same, I’m calming, I must. Two options from here, relax to a possible finish, sprint to a DNF.

Liam, Sean and I get to chatting, they knew the trail and they knew how banter works, we had a laugh, well they had a laugh at my decision making. I’m back now calming but damage done, I push a little again, I go wrong again…. Yes again. Dumbass.

Liam and Sean call out, my saviours, phone rings, Jen.

“I Know” I say

Call ends.

By now my mother-in-law as she always does is watching my dot from Scotland and my sister is watching my dot as she waits for her flight home from Las Vegas. I’ve said it before, I have a good team…. I need them all.

Liam and Sean are amused now, I deserve the stick I’m getting. Schoolboy errors!!

CP2

Had I not met and fell in with Liam and Sean when I did, I’m convinced my anger, and disappointment would have taken me outta this race at CP2. The thought of sneaking out under darkness and being home for breakfast would have brought me the murky comfort I was looking for. Instead, I was back in control (Mostly), new targets, came to finish, pass a few maybe, enjoy it, you’re a finisher. It’ll be bright soon.

It wasn’t long before I realised, I had burnt some important candles while I was in self-destruct mode and climbing was getting tougher and tougher and going up a steep section of boardwalk than was like a sheet of black ice I had to step aside, allow three pass and get my breathe back. It was time to steady the ship, and I did, smile on, the finish line the only goal and away I went.

CP3

Daylight surrounded us, Jen was back in good form, my getting lost didn’t fill her with confidence but I was back on track and depending little or nothing on a wonky watch, daylight was a place of safety, and the job was on. Running nicely now, eating well, hiking strong the other runners around in great form and knowing that the toughest of this thing was done the general mood was lifting at this point.

Plenty of chats, the course was busy never long between passing or being passed so kilometres were disappearing.

DPD drivers out to cheer us along, other crews offering words of encouragement and I landed into the Dying Cow. As a farmer its not my most favourite place name, that said I did wonder if they do a good beef burger!! Met Noel, no intro needed, he’s a soldier too. Think he is trying to rob my crew, we’re ten years married next week, Jen likes living in the country, I’m safe, I hope, he’s cool though!!

25km to home. Time to get stuck in, I was maybe 10th before you know what happened, dropped to mid/late 30’s. Wonder am I near top 20?? Ring Jen!!

“Do me a favour please”

“Your 22^nd overall”

Tom and Jerry, game on!! Pass two to be able live with myself!

Up and down we went, caught one here, caught two there.

One came back at me, wow he is moving, are they all gonna come back?

Lift the knees, hike strong!!

5km left, watch telling me I’m 132Km into the 127km already!!

Clonegal, where the hell are you??

Spent more of this last 5km looking back than I did looking forward, not sure what I had left if I saw a body closing in. One last turn shows that sign I needed, Clonegal is found, I see Jen ahead, she is happy, she is always happy, where is Noel? Good banter!!

Cousin and crew Robbie there too to bring me home.

“All the way, round, touch the sign!!”

Done.

138Km My watch tells me but when it comes to this activity, I don’t and won’t believe a word that retched thing says!! 17^th place overall, something to be proud of, a school day like none other, a piece of granite I will love to hate until I get it a more deserving twin.

Goes without saying thank you as always to all the volunteers who helped to bring this night to life for us all. A pleasure as always to start and finish an IMRA race, I’m starting to realise it’s a special kinda thing is IMRA. Although in the heat of the moment I was “Lost”, the team had an ever-watchful eye on me and I was in no danger, only that of my own stupidity. I unpacked the maps and compass from my pack the next day and smirked at them and thought of that very important and accurate kit check and said to myself, Wicklow Way Race your unfinished in my book!!